The Oilers are one bad week away from the guy in No. 00

Look, every team has a backup plan. Edmonton's backup plan now has a backup plan, and he wears double zeros like a guy who grabbed the last jersey out of the bin.

Thursday the Oilers became the first NHL team to dress a full-time emergency backup goalie. His name is Brett Epp. He sat on the bench in No. 00 while Edmonton lost 5-4 to Anaheim. That's the headline, but the story is how they got there.

Tristan Jarry was sick. Devon Levi was hurt. Frederik Andersen was hurt. So Matt Tomkins, goalie number four, got the start. Four. Most teams don't have four of anything except Zambonis and excuses.

Here's the number. Tomkins stopped 16 of 21 shots, per NHL data. That's a .762. That's not a save percentage, that's a C-minus in chemistry. By our count, Edmonton has already started three different goalies through 17 games, and the fourth guy's whole job is to sit next to Epp and look busy.

The rule

It's new this season. Every team has to carry its own EBUG now. He travels with the club, he practices with the club and he wears 00. He can't have played an NHL game on a standard contract, he can't have more than 80 pro games, and he can't have played pro in any of the last three seasons.

So it's a guy who used to be good at hockey and is now elite at sitting. I respect it. I've been training for that job my whole life.

Grade on the rule: B-plus. The old way, the home team supplied one guy for both benches. That meant a visiting team's season could ride on a local beer-league legend with a mortgage and a day job. Now at least your emergency is your own emergency.

The Oilers

Grade on Edmonton's goalie depth: D. Connor McDavid had a goal and three assists Thursday and still lost. That's like bringing a flamethrower to a snowball fight and walking home soaked. He leads the league with 44 points, and his team is one more bad week from asking Epp to stretch.

Buddy, I'm begging you, the trade deadline is not the only day you're allowed to buy a goalie. You can do it in November. Stores are open.

Bruins tax: In Boston, Epp sits on the bench once in a No. 00 sweater and he's got a sandwich named after him at a bar on Causeway Street by Saturday.

Not a real award: The Ferda Memorial Seat Warmer goes to Brett Epp, who has played zero minutes, allowed zero goals and is somehow the most reliable goalie in the building this week.

He didn't play. He didn't have to. Perfect attendance, perfect save percentage, no complaints. I said what I said.