Hot Sauce: Bob's a Leaf now, and Anaheim gave up 10

Ten goals. Anaheim gave up ten goals to San Jose on Thursday, and somewhere in Orange County a goalie coach quietly updated his LinkedIn.

Look, it's September. Nothing counts. I'm still writing all of it down.

1. The Panthers and Tarasenko are "eying each other." Get a room.

Friedman put the reunion out there this week, and now every Panthers fan is checking Tarasenko's Instagram like an ex who just posted from the airport. He's 34 and unsigned, he scored 23 for Minnesota last year, and Marchand is out through October.

Gord and Marcus have the cap math, and the cap math says November. I have eyes, and my eyes say a guy who won a Cup in this building gets a parking spot. Grade: B. Buddy, I'm begging you, sign it before the humidity breaks.

2. Brind'Amour wants 86 games and zero preseason. Rod, the knees can hear you.

The Hurricanes coach said he'd "sooner go 86 games and zero preseason," because guys are in such good shape now. The league just went to 84 for the first time since 1994, and the veterans only have to play two exhibitions. Rod looked at that and asked for seconds.

Every 34-year-old defenseman read the quote and reached for the ice bath. He's right, which is the annoying part. Grade: A-minus. Docked a letter for making me agree with a Hurricane.

3. The Leafs signed Bob. The Panthers' Bob. I need a minute.

Toronto finished eighth in the Atlantic, missed the playoffs, landed the first overall pick, and then signed a two-time Cup goalie for three years and $21 million. That's not a rebuild. That's your ex hitting a scratch ticket.

His debut in blue was one goal on 11 shots in 28 minutes against Montreal, and Matthews called him "an absolute treat." Bob won two Cups in Sunrise. He's now paid to make Leafs fans believe in October, a job with the shelf life of a Leafs coach. Grade: C. Not for Bob. For the universe.

Bruins tax: Boston's goalie plan is Swayman making 32 saves and losing in overtime. Toronto's is a two-time Cup winner. Great. Tremendous.

4. The Bruins took three penalties and gave up three power-play goals. That's a toll booth.

Boston got shut out by Philadelphia on Thursday with the shots even at 28. Friday in Washington they took three minors and gave up a power-play goal on every one of them, the last 11 seconds into overtime to Jordan Kyrou, who's been a Capital since roughly lunch.

Twenty-eight shots and no goals is a finishing problem. Three for three is a video-session problem. Both in 24 hours is a Bruins problem, and I'd know. Grade: D. I've had colder Septembers. Not many.

5. The Ducks gave up ten to San Jose. Ten.

Five in the first period. Ville Husso allowed six on 21 shots, Laurent Brossoit came in and allowed four on 10, and the Sharks' kids did the rest: Ivar Stenberg three goals and an assist, Michael Misa four points, Igor Chernyshov two.

Ten on 31. The Sumner Tunnel lets fewer things through at rush hour. Yes, it was a camp lineup. San Jose dressed its kids too. Grade: F. F-minus is reserved for the Leafs, and I checked, they weren't playing.

Fight of the week

Dallas and Minnesota, Friday, the last 76 seconds of a 2-1 game. Thomas Harley scored the winner in the second, then at 18:44 of the third he went with Matt Boldy: five and a misconduct each.

Twenty-four seconds later, two more. Jamie Benn and Marcus Foligno paired off like it was 2014, and Justin Hryckowian and Michael McCarron went hard enough to get tossed from an exhibition with 52 seconds left, which is like getting ejected from a fire drill. Hryckowian's roughing minor was served by Tyler Seguin, who I assume didn't volunteer.

Three fights in 24 seconds. Harley scored the winner and fought the other team's best forward in one night, which in Texas is called a Tuesday. My card: Harley over Boldy on the evening, Benn over Foligno on seniority, Hryckowian and McCarron a draw. Grade: A.

Kept off the sheet

Tampa's big four, Thursday, against a Panthers lineup built for Charlotte:

• Nikita Kucherov, 22:13, zero points, minus-2, against guys auditioning for a Checkers sweater.

• Brayden Point, 21:44, zero points, minus-2. That's a long time to not do anything. I've had shorter Registry visits.

• Jake Guentzel, 21:07, four shots, zero points, minus-2.

• Brandon Hagel, 20:12, zero points, minus-2. The whole line went minus-2. That's not a bad night, that's a group project.

• Lukas Reichel, Boston, 18:08 and zero shots in Philadelphia. My uncle gets more pucks on net at the cottage, and he's holding a beer.

Not a real award

The Greensboro Lawn Chair for Blowing a Lead You Had No Business Blowing goes to Nashville, up 5-1 on Carolina in the second period Thursday and losers 6-5 when Felix Unger Sorum scored with three seconds left. Five straight goals against; Logan Stankoven tied it with 1:24 to go. The trophy is a lawn chair, and it folds under pressure.

Ten goals. Sign Tarasenko. I said what I said.